As you may recall, some 2 and a half years ago Tim and I were in the throes of a foolish Goblin campaign. Then COVID hit and the best laid plans were torn asunder. Ours were most certainly not the best laid plans, so they stood no chance under the circumstances. Things were laid aside, and the Goblins were left to do what they do best - gather dust (they're pretty good at bickering and running away too, but they can gather dust with the best of them).
Well, with the games club back up and running properly again, we decided that we had avoided our destinies for long enough. It was time to return to the campaign and determine once and for all, who was the least underwhelming Goblin!
By this point our armies had met twice on the field, and somehow they had drawn both times. Along the way, Mush's Night Goblin contingent had undertaken a side quest to gather reinforcements in their search for victory. However, Skuzzbutt's Goblins had not yet had an opportunity to bolster their own forces. It was time to address this. Skuzzbutt was on his way to try to recruit a tribe of Forest Goblins...
It was a beautiful day in the forest. Bright sunlight filtered through the branches overhead, and the disturbed chirping of little birds was joined by a shrill blast from a steam whistle as the monstrous Marienberg-class Land Ship lumbered slowly through the trees. The machine hissed and groaned as it ran straight over a particularly large spruce, bending and toppling the unfortunate tree before crushing its branches under its steel-reinforced wheels.
The Baron von Pfluffenkopf giggled excitedly as he watched the tree's demise, much as he had every other time he'd witnessed the spectacle. He absent-mindedly stroked the mechanical bird he carried perched on his wrist, despite it obviously having no appreciation of his attentions. Even if it was wound up, the clockwork contraption had no sense of feeling. And the Baron was certainly not to be trusted with a wound-up bird.
Next to him, mounted atop a magnificent clockwork horse, Engineermeister Justus Krieghammer did his best not to watch the Baron's foolish behaviour. Once again he wondered what he was doing on this expedition. He had been perfectly happy to sell the Land Ship to the fabulously wealthy Baron, but he felt no need to be present when the thing was being "tested" on the local Forest Goblin infestation. Unfortunately he had fallen victim to the von Pfluffenkopf's wild enthusiasm, and he had been unable to excuse himself when the expedition had been ready to set off the moment he had delivered the contraption.
Justus winced as the Land Ship ran over yet another large tree, filling the air with splinters, leaves and hissing steam. He had no idea how many trees had already been crushed, but he would have sworn the idiot crew were aiming for as many as possible. It's not that he didn't believe that the vessel could take it - it was just that he'd prefer not to have been around if that proved to be incorrect. He muttered a prayer under his breath that they'd find the Goblins soon and he'd be able to put this business behind him - and some distance between himself and the abused Land Ship...
*****
Skuzzbutt swayed happily as his monstrous hairy spider ambled slowly along the forest path. It was a pleasant day out of the direct sunlight, and he was daydreaming of the many convincing things he was going to say to convince the Forest Goblins of the need to join his war party. He could imagine the dashing figure he would cut at the meeting, his ragged red cape fluttering heroically in the breeze, his barely dented helmet shining weakly in the sunlight...
He was disturbed from his thoughts by the urgent call of his lieutenant, Idjit. "Boss? Boss! You hear dat?"
Blinking for a moment and turning in his saddle, Skuzzbutt was about to abuse the fool for interrupting his idyllic vision when he realised that he could indeed hear something. It sounded like the shrieks and clashes of battle. And something else strange and... clanky-wheezy. His eyes widened when he realised what might be happening. Someone was attacking the tribe he had been intending to recruit. His potential henchmen were in danger!
He booted Fuzzbutt into a hairy gallop, leaving his confused column to try to hurry in his wake.
Chapter 4: (An Unplanned) Flank Attack
The small Forest Goblin tribe finds itself attacked by a much larger force of Empire exterminators. Skuzzbutt's force arrives from a flank chosen when they appear, moving on as reinforcements. Together the Goblin forces are slightly larger than the Empire, but will the Forest Goblins still be there when help arrives?
The Armies
Pfluffenkopf's Goblin Extermination Party
